


Nothing Butt

by queerlyobscure (softestpunk)



Category: Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes, The Avengers - All Fandoms
Genre: Butt Jokes, Fluff, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-14
Updated: 2012-07-14
Packaged: 2017-11-09 22:35:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/459241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softestpunk/pseuds/queerlyobscure
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Steve admires Tony's backside, accidentally reveals a not so deep-and-dark secret, and the word 'butt' appears more times than it probably should.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nothing Butt

"Hey, Rogers, are you staring at my butt again?" Tony smiled at Steve's reflection in the mirror, sleep rumpled and tangled up in the bedclothes. 'Just woke up' was one of his best looks.  
  
"I'm just looking in the general direction your butt happens to be in." Steve yawned. The innocent look he gave Tony wasn't fooling him for a second.  
  
"Sure you are." Tony smirked. "It is a pretty great butt though, right?" He turned around to get a look in the mirror himself.  
  
Steve nodded. "Best I've ever seen."  
  
"Out of yours and mine, you mean? That's sweet. I like your butt, too."  
  
"I mean out of all the ones I've seen." Steve blinked tiredly. "I really like your butt."  
  
"I guess you saw quite a few in the army." Tony turned back around to face Steve.  
  
"Not really?" Steve shrugged. "I always ended up changing separately because of the uniform and the whole thing where I had to stay longer at briefings and debriefings than the other guys."  
  
"I'm going to skip the obvious debriefing joke and go straight on to asking where your extensive knowledge of butts comes from."  
  
"I've seen pictures." Steve blushed, apparently sensing that he'd said too much.  
  
"Where have you seen-" Tony's eyes widened as he realised what was going on. "Oh my god. I did not teach you to use the internet so you could look up naked photos, Steve."  
  
"But that's what you use it for."  
  
Steve's expression gave nothing away, which, in turn, told Tony that he was being toyed with. He could almost have passed for innocent if he'd gotten offended.  
  
"Touché," Tony conceded. "But my butt is still the best butt?"  
  
"Definitely." Steve nodded.  
  
"Wow. High compliment when I'm competing against the whole world. Or at least all the exhibitionists."  
  
"You won Rear Of The Year in 2006. I think it's established fact that you have the best butt in the world."   
  
"You're a terror with an internet connection, huh?" Tony smiled at Steve. "That was six years ago, though."  
  
"Yeah, you're right. It's better now. Must be the workout the suit gives you."  
  
Tony's mouth fell open. "You know it's your butt to do with what you will, right? You don't have to woo it."  
  
"Well, it's attached to you and regardless of whether I need to, I'd like to woo _you_."  Steve shifted around to lie on his back, exposing... well, exposing nearly everything, to Tony's delight.  
  
"And your version of wooing involves complimenting my butt?"  
  
"Isn't that the way it's done these days?" Steve gave Tony a mock-innocent look that he'd learned to interpret as Steve knowing better but pretending to be culturally ignorant. It was cute, so he let it slide.   
  
"Besides, it's your second best feature," Steve continued.  
  
"Yeah?" Tony smiled softly. "And what's my best feature?"  
  
"Your heart."


End file.
